How Warrior Instinct Kills Relationships


People, who act predominantly out of Warrior Instinct,
instinctively engage in behavior that kills the intimacy
between themselves and their partner,
which results in the end of their relationships.

But, they have no awareness they are doing it.

Those who act primarily out of Warrior Instinct are aggressive by nature. They are forceful, and absolutely convinced that they are right in any given situation.

A potential partner might see this as strength.

It is, in fact, rigidity, stubbornness and potentially abusive.

This behavior may be caused by an underdeveloped prefrontal cortex. Those who act primarily out of Warrior Instinct are physically unable to look objectively at their own behavior. They tend to have difficulty admitting when they make mistakes. They seem oblivious to their own behavior, and the consequences of it. And they tend to blame others.

Those who act primarily out of Warrior Instinct see the world in terms of black or white, friend or enemy, with me or against me. What binds a partner to a Warrior will often turn out to be the same thing that turns them away from the Warrior. And in the Warrior's mind their partner will go from friend to enemy, and from with them to against them.


But they will not be able to see that their own behavior is the cause of this.
Warriors believe they are always right.
Especially when they are wrong.

Once a Warrior makes a statement, they have to stick with it. Even if it is blindingly obvious to everyone that their statement is false. Warriors cannot make mistakes. They will go to their deaths defending their position.

This is what makes them perfect for protecting others from dangers that threaten the tribe.


But they are unable to turn off their instinct
when it comes to their intimate relationships.

Those who act primarily out of Warrior Instinct are usually uncomfortable with feelings. You cannot have feelings and be able to pull the trigger and kill an enemy. That causes internal conflict. So these people live with a constant level of denial about the feelings they are actually having.

If you, as their partner, point those feelings out, you will become their enemy.

People who act primarily out of Nurturing Instinct are often attracted to those who act primarily out of Warrior Instinct.

It is a naturally occurring attraction that happens on an instinctive level. It serves to protect the survival of the species.

People who act primarily out of Nurturing Instinct tend to be in touch with their feelings, and talk about them in an open manner. Their Warrior Instinct partner will be very uncomfortable in these situations. They may physically and emotionally withdraw, until there is no intimate connection left. Their partner may be confused about this withdrawal, and will question them about it. This will cause their Warrior Instinct partner to withdraw further until the relationship is dead in the water.

The one acting primarily out of Warrior Instinct will blame the failure of the relationship on their partner because they are not capable of introspection.

In worst case scenarios they may become physically violent towards their partner. They cannot be introspective. They see their partner forcing them to be introspective. Or, making them aware that they cannot see their own behavior. They need to stop this at all costs, because it threatens their denial. So they need to shut their partner up.


See - 8 Ways We Protect Our Denial